Love may require firmness

posted in: How to heal relationships | 0

counseling , mindfulness

Often when I see clients for counseling there are issues in some of their relationships. It may be relatives, friends or work mates.In any relationship we need to be prepared to face what we are doing that may or may not be helpful. Always there are things that will need to be adjusted. Sometimes that may be purely something we are doing. For instance we may be getting angry at our partner because we are stressed or overwhelmed. This is our’s to adjust.
At other times what needs to change is our ability to stand up for what we know is truth. This will require courage to speak to another truly about something that needs to change. The best way to do this is clearly and with compassion.
An example may be if we have a boss at work that is very controlling or micro managing.Staff may feel undervalued or constantly criticized, the boss is generally over stressed. In this situation it is usually helpful to stand up firmly for yourself but not from anger, from compassion. The boss is probably very scared of failure too, all micro managers are. Understand where the boss is coming from, don’t judge the fear in him or her,all of us have fear. However stand up firmly for yourself without anger.
Love often requires speaking the truth, however it helps not to come from judgment while doing so, always compassion.